This is also up LJ as well. Will probably delete this here after tonight or something.
So I wrote a completely harmless short Pokémon fanfic that’s literally brought back at least a dozen responses from readers that it brought them to actual TEARS and yet FF.net threatened to ban me and made me take it down just because its written in the (GASP) second person, which they consider unforgivable for some reason.
Screw all yall.
Also, since September pretty much I’ve been in some sort of PPD like funk regarding The Motorman since I “finished” it, feeling as though I wasted my time and a large part of my life producing a massive embarassment fueled primarily by my own hubris which I have nothing to show for. Merely thinking about it causes me to either get really depressed, or fly off into an internal rage fit of me getting cross about something I don’t know what.
That’s probably why I haven’t even looked at the manuscript to make revisions since September, and why I don’t think I’ve drawn a single Doorworm since then except on SwapNote/Nintendo Letterbox.
I should have known that when I was so severely exhausted and out of it working myself into the ground that I literally mistook a DARN EARTHQUAKE for myself shaking the table too much in an effort to stay awake as I tried to proofread the manuscript running only on root beer scented caffinated soap and energy drinks and shots from 6 AM to 10 PM 7 days a week.
The only thing I feel happy writing right now is this dumb Pokémon fanfic that would probably turn out to be novel length, am writing at a rate of literally perhaps a sentance per week, I dont have time to write in ANY case let alone from the fact that this will do nothing to advance my writing carreer and will never be of any practical utility for me, and that aside from all that, even when I try my hardest to read and review everyone else’s crap in great detail on all the big Pokémon forums that accept fanfiction, I can’t PAY people to even start reading mine.
I could literally write a crappy little one shot about Ash and Pikachu going to the store and buying eggs, milk and bread and get a more positive response than something I put almost the same amount of effort into as The Motorman.
It’s a shame kinda because me reading ambitious, high quality Pokémon fics from adult (as in, OF AGE, not pornogrpahic) Pokémon fic writers as a kid is the only reason I’m an English major today.
Oh, and I start school tomorrow again.
I talk about Nintendo all the time on YouTube because I feel like video games and Nintendo in specific is the only thing in my life that give me something to be optimistic aobut and hasn’t demonstrated a consistant trend of decay as I grow older.
I don’t even play video games that much compared to what people might think. I get perhaps two hours a week of 3DS in if that simply because my life situation finds me constantly in waiting rooms with nothing to do.